Pardon, Please!

Excuse me, it is not my wish to be rude
but I have been appointed by
committee to apprise you of an
unfortunate slack. We do, all of us
very much appreciate your kind
thoughtfulness on our behalf
of that you can be assured, yet
there is something lacking in what we
might call consistency, though we do
very much hesitate to bring this to
your attention. There is an appointed
time that we anticipate and then
behold the time lapses and
through no considered fault of your
own, we know, we are disappointed.
So forgive me for interrupting
your breakfast, I am sure my
peering through your patio doors
surprises you somewhat but
consider it a reminder that we too
would like to enjoy our breakfast
and our accustomed offerings are
absent this morning from your porch
where we have searched in vain..