Notes between the pages

I see you everywhere. I'm reminded of moments we have shared and wish it could have continued. I love the times we shared together, even just sitting in your car in the rain, talking.
I miss  you. XOXOXO

I wish I could take this and keep it forever.
Thank you, my heart. I miss you every day. Every, single day. XOXOXO

Beautiful, my heart breaks when I think about how much I want to be for you. And then realize all I can be. I will take what I can get. Even if all I can get is memories of how wonderful you are.
I tucked my love for you away years ago ... for it to blossom so strong decades later. Now I have this heart that aches to be in your arms, to hold you, to be your everything ... and I feel I need to tuck it away again.
It's so hard not being able to talk or spend time with you. You are my obsession. Thoughts of you consume me. I desire you with everything I am. How lost I feel without  you...
I love you more than words can express. I feel incomplete without you.
But ... at the same time knowing that you are safe, and happy, and being loved ... it brings me a peace. 
Because I can't provide you what you have. A family, respectability, and security.
I'm glad to know you are in a place that you want to be in. I truly and hopefully wish you all the love and joy a person can contain.
I have loved you for longer than anyone I know outside of my family (why did I add that?)
My love for you will always be tucked away and ready to blossom if you ask for it. You are and always will be my soul mate. XOXOXO

I wish there was a safe place we could talk about things.
I'm struggling with what I'm doing to you. I love you too much to put you in a position in your life where I'm the cause of your strife.
Don't risk what you have, because of me. I wouldn't be able to deal with causing  you pain.
You asked me to be your friend. That is what I'm trying to do. 
Love always, XOXOXO
I miss you so much

I don't know if you will ever come back here again.
In case you do there is something I want you to know.
You've changed me. 
I hope it's for the better.
Life for me will never be the same.
Especially with you not being a part of it ... the way you used to be. 
I hope you are happy and loved all the days of your life ... and treated the way you deserve to be treated. You're a precious flower, a gem ...
My heart is and always will be yours. XOXOXO
I hope for happiness and joy and peace and love for us both all the days of our lives.
Yours forever

I love you ...
I feel like I always have ...
I feel like I always will...
I know this is difficult.
Do what you feel you need to do.
I'm here ... if you need me.
I will be whatever you want me to be.
Your friend ...
Your support ...
Your distraction ...
Your bad habit ...
Your lover ...
Your desire ...
Your break from reality ...
Whatever you need
I'm willing to do whatever you ask. But I will not be what destroys  you or brings you down. I want to be what builds you up and brings you joy ...
You mean so much more to me than words can express.
I'm here for you ...
I love you. XOXOXO

I've been struggling with our relationship ...
I have such strong feelings for you. I love you. What we shared -- I will never let go of. At the same time I worry about you. It pains me to see you so stressed and full of regret. Not that you regretted it when it happened but more that you are aware of it now.
You have clearly chosen your family and everything in your life over me. And it makes sense to me that you would. Because choosing me would be devastating. I get that ... and understand why.
So now we find ourselves slowly slipping away from each other.
I want you to never forget how we were together. I am and always will be  your friend. I believe you are my soul mate regardless of our situations and how cruel time has been to us. You are always in my thoughts. I am still hoping that one day again we will be able to hold each other and allow our passion to run free ...
I'm always here for you -- protecting what we had. I will step back and let you make the next move. 
I miss the friend I found.
I miss the passion.
I miss the connection.
I miss you ...

We were something incredible when we were alone.
I will always wonder what could have been.
I dream about what was and what could have been frequently. XOXOXO

I am still here. Not in the same way, but always still here. I'm so sorry for how things have to be. I'm so sorry for so much. I want to say sorry for letting it happen at all, because now there is so much pain. I wonder if we had just walked away at the start how much easier things would be now. Less hurt, less regret, less heartache.
But then I remember ... and I smile thinking of our time together. We made the right decision.
We are friends with really special memories that only we share.
We can't cause each other, or others any more pain, but what we can do is hold on to what we had as a really wonderful, amazing part of our lives and cherish it and each other forever.
Always thinking of you and always remembering. XOXOXO