Observation

When I was a child I became conscious
of the strange feeling that whatever I
did wherever I went someone was
carefully watching me. Not watching
over me but observing me. Who might
it be? God? There was no religious
observance in my family, but I did know
that I was different than others of my
peers and learned at an early age to
'recognize' small silent symbols to
differentiate people. Was I someone's
experiment? I'd better be on my best
behaviour to pass muster in that scrutiny.
So everything I did, whatever I encountered
and responded to, wherever I happened to
be there I was living my life and there
was someone watching. Was I being
judged? Censored? Admired? As I 
grew older such childish concerns left
me and getting on with life I abandoned
that awareness that had me at times
pretending to be a boy, thinking that
would garner less interest. Now I'm
past mere maturity with an awareness
that perhaps I am being watched. And 
the reason for that feeling escapes me. God?
My neighbours? Some hidden unbidden
source that would prove should it ever
reveal itself that we live in parallel worlds?